The good, the bad, and the stupid

June 30, 2017

Tomorrow is July 1st, the day several new laws go into effect
in the great state of Iowa. Some make sense to us while others
have us scratching our heads saying ‘what in the hell were they
thinking?” We’ll list a few here that we like followed by
some we haven’t made sense of yet.

HF 517 goes into full effect. Stand Your Ground just makes
sense. Our doors aren’t locked for our benefit but to keep you
out if you mean us harm. By the time you kick through one of
the solid core with 6-inch screws in all the hardware you will
be looking at the business end of my 45.

SF 444 prohibits the use electronic communication devices
while driving. If you use a device to write, send, or view
an electronic message while driving it will be considered
evidence that you driving in a recless manner with willful or
wanton disregard for the safety of other persons or property.

HF 516 is the Voter Integrity Act dictates a state approved
ID must be shown to vote. We’ve been showing ours for years at
the polling place anyway.

And now, those that don’t make sense to us.

SF 362 involves claims against Fairs for damages arising from
the transmission of pathogens from certain animals housed on
the fairgrounds. If you’re allergic to animals, don’t go to
a livestock.

HF 473 establishes multiple pathways to obtain a High School
Equivalency Diploma beyond an exam. Isn’t the test enough? Or
is this another politically correct idea borne of the
everybody gets a trophy train of thought?

And finally, our favorite. SF 447 will allow farmers to
present an affirmative defense if sued by neighbors who claim
odors or other aspects of an animal feeding operation is a
public nuisance and interferes with their enjoyment of life.

City folk never cease to amaze me. If you aren’t smart enough
to plow around the stumps or didn’t know farms can be smelly,
animals have sex in the open, and dust could be an issue, you
have no business living in the country.

For a more complete list of the new laws that go in effect
July 1st, go here.

Enjoy our last day of June. Don’t know about where you’re at
but it’s noisy here on the east coast of Iowa. Now for a
smaller version of the new pizza I tried last week.
Comments are always welcome.


What happened?

June 15, 2017

Last night we had a strange sunset after a short burst of rain
so I decided to stay up and get a few pictures of the moon
through the remaining clouds. But as sometimes happens, just
when you think you have things figured out the rules get
changed.

The moon didn’t show in the time I allotted for it to do so and
even though it was the wee hours of the morning when I ventured
back inside, sleep wasn’t in the cards. Finally around 5 am the
sandman came and I didn’t move again until the wife woke me
around 9.

Even with a solid four hour snooze I felt tired because while
I was sleeping I dreamed I never went to sleep because I was
outside waiting for the perfect shot and drinking coffee all
night. It wasn’t as vivid as some dreams, but I knew it was a
dream because I rarely use a tripod.

That and the fact that we don’t have a spiral staircase on
the outside of house. There was quite a view from the top of
the imaginary staircase though. Of course this made me ponder
a few things. Like why are the yellow pages yellow?

Or how many people know Dr. George Horace Gallup was born in
Jefferson, Iowa? If you can’t place who he is just remember
he is the founder of the Gallup Poll and a pioneer in public
opinion polling.

Sorry, got off on a side track. Enjoy our Thursday, we’re that
much closer to the weekend races.
Comments are always welcome.


Late again

May 23, 2017

Earlier we went over to see how Dad is doing and he was doing
good. The health care person that was there put him through his
paces with some physical therapy and he had a good breakfast.
He said he was glad to be home and it showed.

It turned out to be a gray drizzly day and since I didn’t feel
like getting soaked it was an inside day. I ventured out a few
times to fill the bird feeder, put some peanuts out for the
squirrels, and bring in the trash bin from the alley.

Which caused me to wonder; if submarines had screen doors who
would be in charge of making sure a hatch was closed so said
door didn’t leak. I could imagine a long drawn out name for the
rate in charge of that.

Then I thought about why spiders have 8 legs. Why not 7 or a
hundred and two? Now some spiders who lost a leg only have 7
but I’ve never seen one with more than eight.

Because of trying to solve these problems this post is late.
The time flew by while my brain went into overdrive and now it
is late. In less than 2 hours I’ll get the wife up so she can
go to work. Guess I’m going to have to pay more attention to
what’s going on around me.

I’ll end there and say enjoy our Tuesday. Before we know it
hump day will be here.
Comments are always welcome.


Card trick

May 21, 2017

While cruising along the information highway yesterday I ran
across and old friend of sorts and since it was Armed Forces
Day I almost did a post then. But since it is now Sunday, this
old friend is a song written in the 1940s, and it is about the
Bible, I’ll share it now.

The song first became a hit in 1948 when performed by country
musician T. Texas Tyler. It would later be performed by the
likes of Wink Martindale, Tex Ritter, and many others. It is
more recitation than song but it makes my eyes leak in a good
way.

If you’ve heard it you know it and if you haven’t watch the
video below. Turn the speakers up a little and listen to
“The Deck of Cards” performed by Tex Ritter.

Enjoy our Sunday.
Comments are always welcome.


Educational chuckle

May 7, 2017

A friend shared this and it gave us a laugh so we’ll share it
with you. Hope you haven’t seen it.

Units Of Measure

1. Ratio of an igloo’s circumference to its diameter= Eskimo Pi

2. 2,000 pounds of Chinese soup= Won Ton

3. 1 millionth of a mouthwash= 1 microscope

4. Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement=
1 bananosecond

5. Weight an evangelist carries with God= 1 billigram

6. Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour+
Knotfurlong

7. 365.25 days of drinking low-calorie beer= 1 Lite year

8. 16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone= 1 Rod Sterling

9. Half a large intestine= 1 semicolon

10. 1,000,000 aches= 1 megahurtz

11. Basic unit of laryngitis= 1 hoarsepower

12. Shortest distance between two jokes= a straight line

13. 2,000 mockingbirds= two kilomockingbirds

14. 1 kilogram of falling figs= 1 Fig Newton

15. 1,000 cc’s of wet socks= 1 literhosen

16. 8 nickels= 2 paradigms


Getting ready

April 30, 2017

Fitness should be important to us senior citizens. If we stay
in shape we could run faster than those not in shape and the
bear would eat them instead. So I’ve added the information
below to help those over 55 stay in shape.

And we’re not sure how things are going to work out, but I
have been chosen for jury duty starting tomorrow morning. We
may have to post later in the day or super early. We’ll have
to see how things work out.

I did notice something on the jury notice that either wasn’t
there before or was missed. The statement reads: “Due to the
possibility that persons involved in the trial may be allergic
to fragrances, prospective jurors are requested to report for
jury duty without wearing any colognes, perfume or scented body
lotions.”

Having checked the number given to ensure I was needed the
reality of the above message hit me. Jurors 001-350 were told
to report for jury duty which means 350 unscented people are
going to be cooped up in some sort of room until selected or
sent home.

And when I leave the house I always have my cell phone, a
pocket camera, a notebook and pen, a flashlight, a multi-tool,
a knife, and cigarettes and lighter on my person. None of these
are allowed inside our court house. That means all the above
mentioned articles end up in the console of the car until I
return. No e-book readers are allowed either.

I’ll do my civic duty as in the past knowing I’ll be safe
after going through the metal detector and leaving my kit in
the car. Enjoy the rest of our Sunday as the work week is only
a dream away.
Comments are always welcome.


How not to die

April 25, 2017

There has been a little drama around the place lately so when
the chores were done it was time for reading. When I came upon
the Old Farmer’s Almanac newsletter, I hit paydirt. Their post
is called “100 Ways To Avoid Dying”.

The claim is the list was compiled by students of folklore
and anthropology based on beliefs from all over the U.S. of A.
Some of these make no sense to us while others do and we’ll
share a few here.

For instance, we couldn’t figure out how placing a broom on a
bed could be fatal or how you would live longer if you kept
your cats off the piano keys. That one’s easy for us as we
don’t have a piano.

Another one that made no sense to us is never carry a peacock
feather into a house. Do others keep their jealous peacocks in
the house?

We wondered what part of the country number 30 came from
which says never wear another’s new clothes before they have
worn them. Although I would imagine breaking into someone
elses house and trying on their clothes might get you shot.

39 states- be sure that someone else cooks your birthday
dinner.

42 says don’t sing in bed, but one could see where that act
may enrage an insomniac.

50 I do every year. It says absolutely no haircuts in March.
That could be how I made it to 66.

52 left the wife and I scratching our heads. It states- don’t
let two people comb your hair at once.

81- never sell a dog.

But our favorite is number 100- Whatever you do, don’t let a
lizard count your teeth. I don’t think that will be a problem.
If you wish to see the entire list, use the link above. Enjoy
our Tuesday, before we know it Wednesday will be here.
Comments are always welcome.