It’s not my fault

March 2, 2018

Last night I had a dream between trips to the head. It wasn’t
as strange as some yet seemed so real I woke up tired. This
dream involved a wooden hulled sailing vessel loaded with
Conestoga wagons and headed for Japan.

In the dream we did everything including loading said wagon into
the hold. Because this occurred in la-la land each wagon had to
be disassembled on the dock, carried to the hold, then get
reassembled. And halfway through the trip we ran into a typhoon
at sea.

I almost came to yelling ‘Land Ho’! When I looked at the clock
it showed we were late for our weekly trip to the grocery store.
After waking the wife and jumping into some denim we made our
way to the mecca of all things edible almost an hour late. And
I was worn out by the time we made it past the produce

Even with the lack of sleep, inability to shake the foggy
brain, and need of coffee we completed our trip only forgetting
half of what we should have got. Due to this fact I will left
with the option of either eating animal crackers plain, or
putting catsup on them.

I guess there’s always the option of making some frosting but
that isn’t going to happen today. My goal at this point is just
to survive this day. If I dream tonight I hope I dream I’m a
tractor. It explains the snoring and isn’t as stressful.

Enjoy our Friday as it means spring is getting closer. In just
9 days we go to Daylight Savings Time and in 18 more days spring
will officially arrive.
Comments are always welcome.


Dream world

January 4, 2018

Last night I thought a solution to my crazy dreams was at hand.
Thinking my habit of eating spicy foods just before bedtime was
the culprit I changed my ways. Instead of pizza, tacos, or 5
alarm chili, a baked chicken breast and baked potato was eaten.

It didn’t work. I dreamed that three of us got in a ton of
trouble traveling around the globe, and beyond. There was
myself, a rotund Scottish organ grinder named Olaf who always
had his pet monkey Pedro on his shoulders, and Sven who was
a world-renowned Romanian chicken wrestler.

We went wherever the winds took us and had no problem finding
the nearest watering hole to wet our whistle. In one such bar an
older lady in an evening gown and dripping diamonds from her
wrist, neck, and ears asked us if we would like to make some

Since the three of us didn’t understand each others I was
appointed spokesman for the group. Olaf spoke with a Scottish
lilt but had a lisp, Sven spoke the language of Romania, and
none of us spoke a language other than our own.

We accepted the lady’s offer so she explained that her prized
pineapple was missing from her refrigerator and she would pay
$32,000 for its return. So off we went in search of the golden
pineapple. Since Olaf had a Porsche we let him drive and we
somehow ended up on the moon but didn’t find the pineapple.

I’m not sure what the dream means but do know now that the
cause is not the type of food eaten before bed. Perhaps I just
have an overactive brain. Enjoy our Thursday and stay warm if
you live in the half of our country that’s subzero.
Comments are always welcome.

Awake in a dream

December 8, 2017

After watching the sunset set fire to the sky I remembered
that I forget to get something written here. For some reason
my brain has been laser focused on trying to decipher a dream
I’ve had for the last 3 nights.

The wife and I are still married in the dream and things start
out normal until we realize said dream is set in the 1940s. We
live in a house I’ve never seen and our daily driver is a
1941 Chevy. Not much strange there as old cars have been a part
of life for 50 years.

The strange part comes when Mom pulls up in 1936 LaSalle
convertible. To my knowledge my folks never owned a convertible
or a LaSalle. When Mom gets out of the car I notice her
familiar blonde hair is different. Halfway down the length of
her hair it is black. She’s been gone for 7 years now yet never
had black hair either.

Right about then I wake up and wonder what’s going on. It may
have no meaning at all much like the cardinals I’ve been
seeing more of lately but still I wonder. It was almost like
at some point she’d dyed her hair black and let it grow out
so the top half would be blonde.

And now I have to start the chores I should have gotten done
during the day. At least the critters got fed. Which reminds
me, I haven’t eaten anything yet today and we restocked the
frozen pizza section of our freezer.

Enjoy our Friday. Here on the east coast of Iowa we have a
dusting of snow in the forecast for tonight,
Comments are always welcome.

What happened?

June 15, 2017

Last night we had a strange sunset after a short burst of rain
so I decided to stay up and get a few pictures of the moon
through the remaining clouds. But as sometimes happens, just
when you think you have things figured out the rules get

The moon didn’t show in the time I allotted for it to do so and
even though it was the wee hours of the morning when I ventured
back inside, sleep wasn’t in the cards. Finally around 5 am the
sandman came and I didn’t move again until the wife woke me
around 9.

Even with a solid four hour snooze I felt tired because while
I was sleeping I dreamed I never went to sleep because I was
outside waiting for the perfect shot and drinking coffee all
night. It wasn’t as vivid as some dreams, but I knew it was a
dream because I rarely use a tripod.

That and the fact that we don’t have a spiral staircase on
the outside of house. There was quite a view from the top of
the imaginary staircase though. Of course this made me ponder
a few things. Like why are the yellow pages yellow?

Or how many people know Dr. George Horace Gallup was born in
Jefferson, Iowa? If you can’t place who he is just remember
he is the founder of the Gallup Poll and a pioneer in public
opinion polling.

Sorry, got off on a side track. Enjoy our Thursday, we’re that
much closer to the weekend races.
Comments are always welcome.

He missed?

June 11, 2017

Another strange morning at Casa Cruiser when I sat up, wide
awake, at 2 am after an odd dream. I had dreamed while outside
taking pictures of the critters a booming voice from above
shouted “God dammit, I missed!”

After turning on the light and checking for singe marks from
the lightening bolt I felt my body for horns or a tail. As is
the norm, I had neither. Since I had only had an hour of sleep
I did what old farts do in the middle of the night and went to
the can.

More sleep was needed and after what seemed like seconds I was
roused from my slumber by the telephone. I didn’t get it before
the answering machine took over after 3 rings so decided to
check it later. Early morning phone calls are usually not good
news anyway.

I was up again a little after sunrise and decided that was all
the sleep I was going to get and got the newspapers off the
porch to stimulate the old brain. When I reached the kitchen
the caller I.D. informed me it was the wife that called. I
assumed she had to work later so didn’t follow up.

Then I thought perhaps something happened to the car and it
wouldn’t start so I called the wifes’ cellphone. That is when
the dream started to make sense. Turns out she was working at
an apartment complex across the river and her car got towed
from the parking lot!

A couple hours later and $125 poorer she returned home. I was
again outside snapping some pics but didn’t have the nerve to
tell her that yesterdays post caused her car to be towed. God
missed! And we laughed. Not really, but I’m not in the dog
house either.

Enjoy our Sunday. It’s going to be a hot one here.
Comments are always welcome.

It seemed so real

March 27, 2017

What is it with squirrels? The other night I made some
burritos topped with 5 alarm chili for my midnight snack and
later there were squirrels in my dream. These were not ordinary
squirrels either. They were evil spawns of Satan who were
plotting to take over the world.

The next morning I took my camera outside and the first thing
I spy is a squirrel on top of the neighbors roof. Not your run
of the mill ordinary squirrels, but one with an attitude. It
started chattering at me like crazy.

Oh yeah, the dream. So I dreamed that a militant group of
nomadic squirrels were planning to take over the world and they
didn’t know I was listening in on the plans. I can be sneaky
when there is a need.

The plan was simplicity itself in that it involved the general
mistrust of others that is rampant, at least in our country.
The evil critters were going to bring down society without
any violence or shots fired. Our government, religion, schools,
even healthcare.

The outlaw squirrels would simply wait until someone in charge
held a meeting and when that someone got to the key point of
their speech a volunteer squirrel would climb up their leg and
snuggle in their skivvies. The speech would be disrupted and
those who didn’t see the squirrel enter the pants would think
the speaker was going insane.

Plans were made to ensure the volunteer could run back down
the pants and to the nearest exit before medical help arrived.
Nobody saw the squirrel go in, nobody saw it leave, but they
did observe the important speaker jumping up and down faster
than a redneck at a hoe down.

To the untrained eye it would appear all people in important
positions had gone off the deep end. After all, would you
believe someone who jumps up in the middle of speech, starts
cussing, and makes moves not normally seen outside of an
exorcism. Trust would be at all time low and protests would
reach record highs.

It was at that point in the plans that the squirrels noticed
me. I somehow made it back inside without a squirrel up my leg
and considered myself lucky. Needless to say, I’m a little
leery of squirrels yet today. I’m having a pizza tonight. Enjoy
our Monday and look out for squirrels.
Comments are always welcome.

Pizza dreams

March 10, 2017

Later last night I took a store bought bacon cheeseburger
pizza, added hot sauce, more bacon, and a lot more cheese, then
put it in the pizza oven for as long as the timer would allow.
It now seems I have again forgotten what eating really spicy
food before bed does to my nightly nap.

I knew the dream was going to be a doozy when I boarded a
bus. I have not been on a bus since I was discharged from the
Navy many moons ago. Yet get on the bus I did. Then the bus
driver announced, “next stop Italy”. We all got off said bus
in a rustic little town and were told we should go to a local
saloon and experience the performing pirate monkey.

Well there’s a pitch you can’t refuse. Finding the saloon,
complete with swinging doors at the entrance, was like going
back in time. Brass rail along the base of the bar and even
spittons positioned every few feet. As soon as we all had a
seat the lights dimmed, the stage curtains parted, and a local
celebrity began his spiel.

“Mario the performing pirate monkey will be on shortly.
Please hold your applause until the end of his performance,
and don’t make any loud noises.” Quite a build up. So outs
walks this monkey about 2 feet tall wearing green satin pants,
a red vest, and a yellow fedora carrying a tambourine. Imagine
our surprise when we found out the only song this monkey could
play on his tambourine was “Would Jesus Wear A Rolex On His
Television Show?”

After an hour watching this local treasure perform his one
song we were in need of stronger drink. I never did learn
why this critter was proclaimed a performing pirate monkey and
was still in Italy when I woke up. Before I got my bearings I
thought Italy looks a whole lot like our house. No more hot
sauce on my midnight pizzas.

Enjoy our Friday, the weekend is here. Just in time for us
to have a chance of snow.
Comments are always welcome.