A priest, a minister, and a rabbi want to see who’s best
at his job. So they each go into the woods, find a bear,
and attempt to convert it.
Later they get together. The priest begins: “When I found
the bear, I read to him from the Catechism and sprinkled
him with holy water. Next week is his first communion.”
“I found a bear by the stream,” says the minister, “and
preached God’s holy word. The bear was so mesmerized that
he let me baptize him.”
They both look down at the rabbi, who is lying on a gurney
in a body cast. “Looking back,” he says, “maybe I shouldn’t
have started with the circumcision.”
Wife: What are your plans for Easter?
Husband: Same as Jesus…
Wife: What do you mean?
Husband: I will disappear on Friday and reappear on Monday!
On hearing that the wife retorts,”AWESOME, you do that, I’ll
do a Mary and show up pregnant untouched by my husband.”
The man stayed home.