I went over to visit Dad and we talked of those
who are longer with us, family, the farm, the
upcoming trip the wife and I are taking, and the
recent WHO declaration against bacon.
We got passed the deaths, the health of our
family, and our vacation alright, but the Antique
Farmer got animated when it come to learning that
the WHO declared processed meats and red meat are
as cancerous as smoking.
The minute it was out of my mouth I heard ‘bullshit!’
I reminded him not to shoot the messenger so he
said he’d been eating meat all his life and he is
90 years old. Then he asked what would happen to
all the hogs and cattle if people didn’t eat them.
I admitted I didn’t know and he asked me what I’d
been hearing about it. Reminding him everything is
a rumor at this point I told him one someone
would want to tax meat like they tax cigarettes. The
Antique Farmer said everything is too high now.
So I told him that another rumor is that the
government wouldn’t allow restaraunts to sell meat.
The look on his face was priceless before he asked
‘then who the hell would go out to eat?’
Saving what I thought was the best for last, I told
him that some scientists think animal farts add to
the pollution that is causing global warming. And
I again heard ‘bullshit!’
He thought for a bit and said that nobody was
taking his meat away in his lifetime. I swear
the man forgets he’s 90.
Not wanting to leave him in a snit I brought up
the farm and the wooden bridge over the creek that
groaned like a banshee when you ran a tractor over
it. He was calm when I left and I’d guess he was
daydreaming about running the old tractor over that
sorry looking bridge. But he still isn’t going to
give up his meat!
Comments are always welcome.