Trouble in paradise


Here on the east coast of Iowa people are
collectively shaking their heads about recent
unrelated incidents. We’ll explain.

It all started the other day when one bank was
robbed and there was an attempted robbery at yet
another bank. Then came news of a fatality caused
by street racing, which was followed by shots being
fired in a building that also housed the Marine
Corps recruiting station, then the death of a
shooter in a different location.

We have heard no updates concerning the bank
robberies but the investigation is ongoing. We do
believe when people get desparate bank robberies

Although reports of several shots fired inside an
office we are happy to say that nobody got shot.
Police don’t know if the shooter who committed
suicide is connected to the shooting near the
recruiting office and we won’t speculate.

After the street racing incident, which took place
on busy street around 4 pm and killed an innocent
woman in another vehicle, our Alderman got face
time on TV. His answer?

Make downtown all two-way streets and lower the
speed limit! If it wasn’t right before the city
elections it would be laughable.

Is there something in our drinking water? Did
these people just go crazier than an outhouse rat
at the same time? Was it the news that the WHO now
says bacon causes cancer? We don’t pretend to know
and refuse to speculate.

Thank you Davenport and Bettendorf police for your
fast response.
Comments are always welcome.


6 Responses to Trouble in paradise

  1. gh0stpupp3t says:

    That is screwed up. Our mayor is hellbent on destroying the roads of my town.. mainly Davis Dr. They are making a bus lane… making it bigger but the thing is, the workers take their bloody time fixing it up. o_o

  2. cruisin2 says:

    we get our share of street projects that seem to take forever also.

  3. thescoundrel says:

    This news just in – “Living causes cancer”. Film at eleven.

  4. cruisin2 says:

    thanks for the laugh.

  5. Nitrous55 says:

    You forgot the cops getting to use the armored car in our neighborhood. Great example of crowd control. Kids were running around.

  6. cruisin2 says:

    the armored vehicle rumbled by our place later. All that and the guy snuck out of the house anyway. Never a dull moment around here.

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