The whole truth

In ancient Israel, it came to pass that a trader by
the name of Abraham Com did take unto himself a
healthy young wife by the name of Dorothy.

Dot Com was a comely woman, broad of shoulder, and
long of leg. Indeed, she was often called Amazon
Dot Com.

And she said unto Abraham, her husband, “Why dost
thou travel so far from town to town with thy goods
when thou canst trade without ever leaving thy tent?

And Abraham did look at her as though she were
several saddle bags short of a camel load, but simply
said, “How, dear?”

And Dot replied, “I will place drums in all the towns
and drums in between to send messages saying what you
have for sale, and they will reply telling you who hath
the best price. The sale can be made on the drums and
delivery made by Uriah’s Pony Stable (UPS).”

Abraham thought long and decided he would let Dot have
her way with the drums.

And the drums rang out and were an immediate success.
Abraham sold all the goods he had at the top price,
without ever having to move from his tent.

To prevent neighboring countries from overhearing what
the drums were saying, Dot devised a system that only
she and the drummers knew. It was known as Must Send
Drum Over Sound (MSDOS), and she also developed a
language to transmit ideas and pictures – Hebrew To
The People (HTTP).

And the young men did take to Dot Com’s trading ‘as
doth the greedy horsefly take to camel dung’. They
were called Nomadic Ecclesiastical Rich Dominican
Sybarites, or NERDS.

And lo, the land was so feverish with joy at the new
riches and the deafening sound of drums that no one
noticed that the real riches were going to that
enterprising drum dealer, Brother William of Gates,
who bought off every drum maker in the land. Indeed
he did insist on drums to be made that would work
only with Brother Gates’ drum heads and drumsticks.

And Dot did say, “Oh, Abraham, what we have started
is being taken over by others.”

And Abraham looked out over the Bay of Ezekiel, or
e-Bay as it came to be known.

He said, “We need a name that reflects what we are.”
And Dot replied, “Young Ambitious Hebrew Owner
Operators.” “YAHOO,” said Abraham.

And because it was Dot’s idea, they named it YAHOO
Dot Com.

Abraham’s cousin, Joshua, being the young Gregarious
Energetic Educated Kid (GEEK) that he was, soon
started using Dot’s drums to locate things around
the countryside.

It soon became known as God’s Own Official Guide to
Locating Everything (GOOGLE).

That is how it all began.

And that’s the truth
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