Almost over quest


The quest to find, and conquer, the evil
little electronic tablet from hell is almost
at an end.

The wife seems happy that I have downloaded
11 books to the tablet with only 37 assists
from her.

Going into this I thought, how hard can it
be? I have calmly worked on classic Jaguar
motors, built and remodeled houses, and
dabbled in art.

The hardest part, at least for me, was
mastering control of my fingers. I punched
icons like on a keyboard, but this resulted
in strange actions by the machine.

For some reason the camera kept activating
and I had several pictures of the top of my
head but no books.

So I watched her manipulate her tablet
until I got an idea. The goal wasn’t to
finger punch the device into submission,
but to gently persuade it to do my bidding.

Once I tried this action my luck changed.
If I petted the evil thing, instead of
jabbing it, the machine worked!

I killed it with kindness and it rewarded
me by actually doing what I wanted it to.

Now I have to put up with the wife bugging
to read something on it. I have explained I
am close to finishing a paperback.

The only problem I am having now is unlocking
the screen. I swipe my finger over the icon
a couple dozen times and it doesn’t open. It
just stares back at me.

The wife confused my even more when she
said I needed a stylist. I thought, what
does my hair have to do with this tablet

She explained slowly that she had said
stylus. Which got me wondering what the
tablet had to do with record players.

But she patiently explained it was like
a little pencil without lead. Really?

If they come up with something new, they
should have to come up with a new name for
it too. It confuses us oldfarts.
Comments are always welcome.

11 Responses to Almost over quest

  1. thescoundrel says:

    Despite my vision challenges- No one has been capable of convincing me I can’t live without one of those devices. All I can say is better you than I! My solution for small buttons not designed for my ham-hock hands –>> Get the Maul and recycle the POS!

  2. Brittius says:

    This is scary stuff!

  3. cruisin2 says:

    I’ve been told a lot of people really like the tablets, but I just don’t see the attraction. When I use it for a while that might change. And I do have axe setting on the back porch if the tablet bugs me too much.

    It was almost like an Abbott and Costello skit, but she was serious.

  4. Brittius says:

    Then, Who, reads the tablet? {Exactly!}
    What, is the name of the person reading the tablet? {No, Who.}
    The person reading the tablet… {Who!}
    I Don’t Know?? {No, no. That’s the paperback reader.}
    Who’s reading the paperback? {I Don’t Know!}

  5. QC Ghost says:

    I take the iPad with me everywhere. I just wish it was waterproof.

  6. I take my Ipad on vacation instead of my laptop. I can check e-mails, look up information on the Internet, write in Evernote, and read on the Kindle app. I use the camera to take photos that I want to send to friends immediately. Tablets are really useful devices. (Mine was a gift that I didn’t ask for.)

  7. Brittius says:

    I take a little pencil stump with me whenever I travel. For those moments when I desire technology, I turn to my fountain pen.
    (I also shave with a straight razor)

  8. cruisin2 says:

    lol, exactly.

    I’ll have to wait and see it grows on me, or remember to turn on my cell phone more often.

    Sounds useful, but I’m learning to walk before I start running.

    lol, when the salesman started talking tablets, I pulled my paper notebook out of my coat pocket. It was good for notes on the subject.

  9. Mart Dawson says:

    Hey, your gettin there. Keep it up. Lovin these little tales 🙂

  10. gpcox says:

    I’ve been there, so don’t expect this old fart to be of any help.

  11. cruisin2 says:

    Mart Dawson,
    Thanks, I’m giving it my best shot.

    lol, it’s funny that when I was 17 I knew everything but I’m this
    dumb at 61.

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