Military wisdom

 For all us veterans, here is some wisdom from military manuals and elsewhere. While we didn’t didn’t see the Admiral’s Law, there are quite a few.

Wit and Wisdom from Military Manuals
“If the Enemy is in range, so are you.”- Infantry Journal

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“It is generally inadvisable to eject over the area you just bombed” – U.S. Air Force Manual

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“Aim towards the Enemy” – Instructions printed on U.S.Rocket Launcher

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“When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend.” – U.S. Marine Corps

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“Cluster bombing from B-52s is very, very accurate. The bombs are guaranteed always to hit the ground.” – USAF Ammo Troop

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“Whoever said the pen is mightier then the sword obviously never encountered automatic weapons.” – General MacArthur

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“Try to look unimportant; they may be low on ammo.” – Infantry Journal

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“You, you, and you. Panic. The rest of you come with me.” – U.S. Marine Gunnery Sgt

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“Tracers work both ways.” – U.S. Army Ordnance

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“Five second fuses only last three seconds” – Infantry Journal

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“Don’t ever be the first, don’t ever be the last, and don’t ever volunteer to do anything.” – U.S. Navy Swabbie

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“Bravery is being the only one who knows you’re afraid.” – David Hacckworth

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“If your attack is going too well, you’re walking into an ambush.” – Infantry Journal

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“No combat-ready unit has ever passed inspection.” – Joe Gay

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“Any ship can be a minesweeper. Once.” – Unknown

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“Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do.” – Unknown Marine Recruit

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“Don’t draw fire; it irritates the people around you.”

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“If you see a bomb technician running, follow him.” – USAF Ammo Troop

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“You’ve never been lost until you’ve been lost at Mach 3.” – Paul F. Crickmore (test pilot)

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“The only time you have too much fuel is when you’re on fire.”

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“Blue water Navy truism: There are more planes in the ocean than submarines in the sky.” – From an old carrier sailor

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“If the wings are traveling faster than the fuselage, it’s probably a helicopter – and therefore, unsafe.”

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“When one engine fails on a twin-engine airplane, you always have enough power left to get you to the scene of the crash.”

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“Without ammunition, the USAF would be just another expensive flying club.”

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“What is the similarity between air traffic controllers and pilots? If a pilot screws up, the pilot dies; If ATC screws up…. The pilot dies.”

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“Never trade luck for skill.”

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The three most common expressions (or famous last words) in aviation are: “Why is it doing that?”, “Where are we?” And “Oh S…!”

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“Weather forecasts are horoscopes with numbers.”

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“Airspeed, altitude and brains. Two are always needed to complete the flight successfully.”

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“Mankind has a perfect record in aviation; we never left one up there!”

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“Flashlights are tubular metal containers kept in a flight bag to store dead batteries.”

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“Flying the airplane is more important than radioing your plight to a person on the ground who is incapable of understanding or doing anything about it.”

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“The Piper Cub is the safest airplane in the world; it can just barely kill you.” – Attributed to Max Stanley (Northrop test pilot)

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“A pilot who doesn’t have any fear probably isn’t flying his plane to its maximum.” – Jon McBride, astronaut

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“If you’re faced with a forced landing, fly the thing as far into the crash as possible.” – Bob Hoover (renowned aerobatic and test pilot )

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“A slipping gear could let your M203 grenade launcher fire when you least expect it. That would make you quite unpopular in what’s left of your unit.” – Army’s magazine of preventive maintenance.

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“Never fly in the same cockpit with someone braver than you.”

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“There is no reason to fly through a thunderstorm in peacetime.” – Sign over squadron ops desk at Davis-Monthan AFB, AZ, 1970

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“If something hasn’t broken on your helicopter, it’s about to.”

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Basic Flying Rules: “Try to stay in the middle of the air. Do not go near the edges of it. The edges of the air can be recognized by the appearance of ground, buildings, sea, trees and interstellar space. It is much more difficult to fly there.”

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“You know that your landing gear is up and locked when it takes full power to taxi to the terminal.”

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As the test pilot climbs out of the experimental aircraft, having torn off the wings and tail in the crash landing, the crash truck arrives. The rescuer sees a bloodied pilot and asks, “What happened?” The pilot’s reply, “I don’t know, I just got here myself!” – Attributed to Ray Crandell (Lockheed test pilot)

5 Responses to Military wisdom

  1. This is easily the best one of these type of things that you’ve posted. I’m surprised the Claymore mine’s “Front towards enemy” wasn’t on there though.

  2. Huck Finn says:

    My very best flight instructor received a dozen or more medals flying in Vietnam. He was a simple man. He carried a crow bar in his helmet bag (a lesson he learned after crash landing in combat).

    I think he wrote the A-4 Skyhawks’s procedure for engine fire:
    1. CONFIRM FIRE.
    2. EJECT.

    His schedule read, “Brief, fly, debrief, eat, repeat, sleep,” and the man stuck to his schedule six days a week, 50 weeks a year. When I was his student, I think he had more flight hours than I had hours alive. He explained to me that if something bad happened in the aircraft, it was probably caused by something very basic that we did (or failed to do) in the planning, brief, preflight, or flight. “Realize it. And undo it, if you can.”

    He boiled it down to, “If you open the ashtray and the engine fails, first shut the ashtray.”

  3. Ilcantar says:

    I saw this a few years ago but cant find my copy so Im doing this from memory and it may be a bit off but those of you who have been in any branch will understand. These go for any branch generally.
    Be cautious when you hear the following
    An E-1 saying “This is the way the book says to do it”
    An O-1 saying “This is what we should do based on my experience”
    RUN WHEN YOU HEAR THIS
    ANY E-9 saying “Watch this s**t” (Run really fast if he is grinning

  4. anonymous says:

    On Paine`s new blog, someone is commenting, and signing it Keith. Alderman Meyer has been blogging for over a year now, and I have never seen him type or comment like that. I wonder if someone is impersonating him. (tin hat theory)
    The typing looks like Shelly`s after she`s half sauced at Mac`s.

  5. anonymous says:

    Did QCI move out of the Macaroni Building?

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